Post by onamirrorsedge on Apr 2, 2012 6:49:55 GMT -5
Clint Eastwood, to me, is second only to Jimmy Stewart in the cool stakes. Here is a man that exudes charisma, whose eye twitching appears in every film, and whose vision transcends the boundaries of irony.
From the Good, the Bad and the Ugly, A Few Dollars More and the Outlaw Josey Wales - to Unforgiven, Dirty Harry, Bronco Billy (etc) he is constantly gripping, charismatic and engaging; and although some films are fun without being particularly good (The Enforcer) he is nonetheless one of my favourite actors of all time.
However, sometimes in life you can see something so vile, so repugnant, so irritating, that it challenges your very faith in life. I am, of course, talking about Clint films - any which way you can, any which way but loose and, sigh, the Rookie.
The Any Which Ways (and I am sorry to use such terrible language on this site) sees Clint, sigh, as a redneck styled trucker, and I cringe as I write this, with a best friend who is called Clyde. Now Clyde, some of you may not know, is an orangutan.. The box of the dvd states that Clyde steals the show.... This is not the case. In fact, Clyde is worse than the black widows (I shake my head as I write that down, but I feel that this is somewhat therapeutic, as I have never faced the trauma that watching these films has caused) who I must say are the worst excuse for humour/entertainment I have ever seen). Clyde is added to the films for no good reason, a bit like Sondra Locke in the second, and is basically dragged around to assist Clint in the hoot-a-minute action.
What makes me particularly angry about these films, is in the second 'installment' of tripe, Clyde is wearing a watch. Now, there is no reason for this. He is an orangutan. He does not need a watch. Yet, he is wearing it. This annoys me more than ma, more than the lack of Echo in the second, and more than the defeat of Conan's father. Clyde can throw a punch, highlighting the fact that for some reason they decided an animal should be in a film, wearing a watch, for no good reason.
In a further disgusting and disturbing scene, Clint (as standard) is about to get some action, and Clyde comes over and cuddles up with the about-to-mate pair. Why anyone would include this is beyond me, and I have to say that this film is possibly one of the worst I have ever seen. Due to this scene, not only is the film annoying, it is also sick.
Now, as for the Rookie. Clint Eastwood stars with Charlie Sheen. Clint plays a cop, whose partner is killed by Gomez Adams. Seeking revenge, he doesn't account for the joke that is Sheen being placed as his partner. Sheen is a cop, haunted by nightmares of meetings where he is accused of killing his brother. He is a rich kid, and a bratty one at that. And it is Clint's job to challenge the establishment, get Sheen into shape and bring down the car criminals who killed his pal. In one particularly annoying scene, Sheen goes crazy and drives Clint's motorbike into his house, making some ridiculous wise crack about how he is a man now. I cannot express how bad this film is, and no amount of alcohol can make it seem worth while.
So, anyway, I digress. What I am saying is Clint Eastwood, the legend we all know and love, the hero of the western, the John Marston of the movie world, the star of classic films that will ride the tide of history is also the protagonist of ultimate tedium and misery, a condition I can only consider to be movie bi-polar.
And I haven't even mentioned Pink Cadillac.
From the Good, the Bad and the Ugly, A Few Dollars More and the Outlaw Josey Wales - to Unforgiven, Dirty Harry, Bronco Billy (etc) he is constantly gripping, charismatic and engaging; and although some films are fun without being particularly good (The Enforcer) he is nonetheless one of my favourite actors of all time.
However, sometimes in life you can see something so vile, so repugnant, so irritating, that it challenges your very faith in life. I am, of course, talking about Clint films - any which way you can, any which way but loose and, sigh, the Rookie.
The Any Which Ways (and I am sorry to use such terrible language on this site) sees Clint, sigh, as a redneck styled trucker, and I cringe as I write this, with a best friend who is called Clyde. Now Clyde, some of you may not know, is an orangutan.. The box of the dvd states that Clyde steals the show.... This is not the case. In fact, Clyde is worse than the black widows (I shake my head as I write that down, but I feel that this is somewhat therapeutic, as I have never faced the trauma that watching these films has caused) who I must say are the worst excuse for humour/entertainment I have ever seen). Clyde is added to the films for no good reason, a bit like Sondra Locke in the second, and is basically dragged around to assist Clint in the hoot-a-minute action.
What makes me particularly angry about these films, is in the second 'installment' of tripe, Clyde is wearing a watch. Now, there is no reason for this. He is an orangutan. He does not need a watch. Yet, he is wearing it. This annoys me more than ma, more than the lack of Echo in the second, and more than the defeat of Conan's father. Clyde can throw a punch, highlighting the fact that for some reason they decided an animal should be in a film, wearing a watch, for no good reason.
In a further disgusting and disturbing scene, Clint (as standard) is about to get some action, and Clyde comes over and cuddles up with the about-to-mate pair. Why anyone would include this is beyond me, and I have to say that this film is possibly one of the worst I have ever seen. Due to this scene, not only is the film annoying, it is also sick.
Now, as for the Rookie. Clint Eastwood stars with Charlie Sheen. Clint plays a cop, whose partner is killed by Gomez Adams. Seeking revenge, he doesn't account for the joke that is Sheen being placed as his partner. Sheen is a cop, haunted by nightmares of meetings where he is accused of killing his brother. He is a rich kid, and a bratty one at that. And it is Clint's job to challenge the establishment, get Sheen into shape and bring down the car criminals who killed his pal. In one particularly annoying scene, Sheen goes crazy and drives Clint's motorbike into his house, making some ridiculous wise crack about how he is a man now. I cannot express how bad this film is, and no amount of alcohol can make it seem worth while.
So, anyway, I digress. What I am saying is Clint Eastwood, the legend we all know and love, the hero of the western, the John Marston of the movie world, the star of classic films that will ride the tide of history is also the protagonist of ultimate tedium and misery, a condition I can only consider to be movie bi-polar.
And I haven't even mentioned Pink Cadillac.
